Our Moments with God
There was a time, at night, when I was feeling really down and lonely and I felt like I wasn’t good enough. That’s when I heard God talking to me and comforting me. I could literally hear His voice speaking to me, telling me that He loves me and is always there for me and that I should not belittle myself.
At that time I was already crying because I had been upset, and when I heard Him speaking to me, I had a sudden change in emotions, I felt so loved (like as if He was really hugging me and telling me that all will be well) that I cried even more, but this time, it was tears of joy.
On the last day of camp, we were celebrating the Eucharist. At the end of Eucharist, Father asked us the people who wanted to be prayed over to kneel in front of the altar. I was one of the many to go in front. As I was praying and thanking God for everything He has done for me, I started to feel really bad and guilty because I realized I did nothing for Him at all.
I cried and cried, asking for Jesus for His forgiveness. I kept repeating for God to forgive me when Father came to pray over me.
I felt a strong presence, and a bright light formed in front of me even when I had my eyes closed. The light was really blinding and warm. I could feel the heat coming from the light. After that, I heard a voice calling out to me, “Laura, I forgive you.” And I knew that that was Jesus speaking to me.
I was very anxious about my uni posting results and was really scared and worried that I didn’t get accepted into any uni, as I would have to spend another 3 years of my life in poly. There was once when I was praying, I was telling Him abour my fears and anxieties and confiding in Him when I heard Him ask me not to worry. He even challenged me, asking “You wanna bet?”. Of course I said no.
I had a God-encounter that made a huge impact on me in Con 4 Camp this year. In the past few years, there were many instances where I have felt so stressed out by school, friends, hobbies and church that sometimes I just break down at home and say: “I didn’t choose to be Catholic”. It was a pretty bad time. I knew what I was saying and thinking was wrong, and that stressed me out even more.
But during Con 4 Camp, during adoration, I felt a force moving down my arms, making the different parts unable to move. I knew immediately that it was God trying to communicate with me because I felt this in Con 3 Camp, so I just let it happen. I thought to myself, “What are you trying to tell me?”
At that point of time, I saw Jesus crying. I didn’t see His face directly, it was more a mental image with Jesus weeping. He lamented over and over, asking why I did not trust Him. Asking me why do I do ‘that’ to Him. I realised that ‘that’ meant my constant denial of Him. I was so overwhelmed by grief and I wanted to apologise to Him so badly so I cried, and the only thing I could think of through the whole session was: “I’m sorry God, I’m so sorry”. I couldn’t even bear to ask for forgiveness.
I was getting lonely on my 18th birthday. No one really knew about it, and I hadn’t even celebrated it with my family. But God appeared to me so vividly in my prayers that day. He walked with me through a forest and kissed me on my forehead.
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